Real Life Wedding Planning

The other day I heard that a bride called her caterer a week before her wedding only to discover the number had been disconnected, the caterer had gone out of business.  Unfortunately, this has been happening recently.  With the recession, people are spending less and many small businesses have suffered because of it.

Here are somethings you can do to protect yourself from disappointment:

• Interview your vendors carefully, take the time to know how they do business.  If you get a feeling that something might go wrong, trust your instinct and find someone else.

• Keep in touch with your vendors, don’t wait until the week before your wedding to confirm an order that you made six months ago.

• Make sure your contracts spell out what would happen to your deposits and orders if  they do not fulfill their contract (see previous post).

• If you purchase wedding insurance, make sure it protects you in the event a vendor goes out of business.

• If you charge your deposits to a credit card, ask your card company if they would refund your money if you have a dispute that involves a company that goes out of business.

I was doing a wedding planning consultation with a bride and groom and I asked about the groom’s cake.  They had not heard of this cake so, in case you also haven’t heard it either, here is some information:

The groom’s cake originates from a tradition in the American South.  The legend is that single women attending a wedding should go home with a piece of groom’s cake and put it under her pillow.  When she sleeps, she will dream of her future husband.

Today, many brides order a cake decorated to reflect their groom’s hobby or special interest and surprise them with it at the rehearsal dinner (to be used as dessert) or their wedding reception.  For example, the Lakers cake above, made by Merci Beaucoup Bakery and featured on the WeTV show, Amazing Wedding Cakes, was ordered by a bride as a wedding day surprise for her groom.

If you want to have the groom’s cake at your reception, rather than serving it, you can use it as a wedding favor.  Have the bakery supply small boxes for slices of cake that your guests can take home and eat later – or put under their pillows!

Maybe you’ve been good about your wedding planning, hired vendors, signed contracts, all in plenty of time.  But now you think you want to make changes in your bouquet, add extra touches to your cake, or have the caterer change your salad choice. Can you do it?

Maybe…

Here are some things that could happen when you make last minute changes:

• You will be charged extra just for making the change and, if the vendor needs to rush order anything to make the change, you will also be paying that charge

• The vendor may not be able to accommodate you if they have to order particular items, for instance a type of flower, and their supplier cannot accommodate them

• If it is a major change, there may not be the time to do it

Good vendors will do everything they can to give you what you want or offer alternative suggestions if they cannot do it.

Check your contract to see how the vendor handles changes and ask how much it will cost.  Then check you budget and make sure you feel the change is worth the extra expense before proceeding

Are you concerned about wedding crashers?  Not only strangers who want to attend a wedding party, but former spouses or partners who might cause problems, uninvited guests who think you “forgot” to invite them or thieves, if your gift table is in an open area.

Don’t ask friends and family members or your wedding planner to handle these concerns for you, hire wedding security.  Wedding security personal, sometimes off-duty police officers, dress as guests, blend in and provide assistance where and when needed.  Your venue should be able to suggest companies who offer these services to you or check with local security companies.

I hope I’m not worrying you too much, since my last post was about wedding insurance.  I want to make sure you take the actions you need to that allow you to fully enjoy your special day.

With all your careful wedding planning, could anything possibly go wrong?  Yes.  This is why, as I mentioned in a previous post, you need to make sure you read all the details on your contracts with wedding vendors before you sign them.  You might also want to consider purchasing wedding insurance.

Many types of wedding insurance policies are available to save you from financial loss if:

• You postpone or cancel because of illness or bad weather

• A vendor fails to appear or deliver as promised

• Your photos are loss or stolen

• You gifts are stolen

• Your wedding dress gets ruined

• Your venue requires that you carry liability insurance

Check with your insurance agent, get referral from recent brides, or check the internet for further information on coverage.

As with purchasing from any vendor, make sure you completely understand what you are paying for.

You’ve found your wedding vendors (see post on April 25), met with them (post on May 15) and are ready to hire the ones who you believe are the best fit for you and your budget.  Professional vendors will give you a contract to review and sign along with a request for a deposit.  Be sure you read the contracts thoroughly to make sure you are getting what you expect.  A few things you want in your contracts:

• The exact product and service they are providing and the date and time they will be delivered.

• The type of changes that can be made and the deadline for making them.

• Refund and cancellation policies.

• Payment policies, when deposits are due.

• Their contingency plan – what will they do if, for some reason, they cannot be present or provide their services, as contracted, on the day of the wedding.  Who will handle your wedding in their place?

Even if you are working with a wedding planner, you need to make it a point to know the details for your contract so you don’t get any unwanted surprises on your wedding day.

Don’t select your wedding day transportation until you have selected your wedding dress.  Why?  Because you need to make sure you can enter and exit the vehicle without ruining your gown.

Brides I have worked with hired stretch limousines on their wedding day.  These cars have not been a problem no matter what style of dress they were wearing because  these cars are close to the ground and the doors are large.  However, Hummer limos are now a fairly popular choice with couples.  I was given the privilege of riding in one recently.  It was a fun ride but in order to get into the car, I had to duck my head and climb up into it at the same time.  I can’t imagine it would be easy for you to get into if you are are in a ball gown or mermaid dress or if your dress has a long train.

So, when you are investigating the mode of transportation you want to use on your wedding day, whether it is a vintage car, a horse drawn carriage, or a limo, think about the style of your wedding gown and look at the vehicle before you make a commitment.

I blogged about meeting wedding vendors in person in my April 25, 2009 post.  Please be sure you set up your meeting at a public place or in an actual professional business location.  You should not be inviting vendors who you don’t know into your home or go to their homes, no matter how nice they sound over the phone or on email.  Suggest meeting at a potential wedding site or a cafe where you can talk privately.  Also, it’s best not to go alone.   Take your fiancee or a member of your bridal party.

Always be safe, take precautions when you are meeting someone for the first time.  Not everyone is who they say they are.

Are you and your fiancee looking on the Internet for wedding professionals?  Great!  Almost all wedding planners, caterers, photographers, videographers and other vendors have websites and will give you the information you want to know before you contact them.  However, I recently heard that some couples sign contracts and give deposits to vendors before they meet them in person.  Please don’t do that!  You must meet with every vendor before you hire them.  Get to know them and be sure they represented themselves accurately online.  Make sure you feel confident they can help you carry out your wedding vision in the way you want before you hire them.